I’ve avoided the entire World Cup/Americans hate soccer story because…well…I really don’t care about soccer. For me, the sport is as exciting a watching paint dry. There are few things in this world that I could care less about than soccer. Well, maybe “chick flicks,” but you get the idea.. But then, NPR had to spout off this nonsense.
Among adults, the sport is also growing because people from Latin America, Africa, and the West Indies have brought their love of the beautiful game to an increasingly multicultural United States. As sports journalist Simon Kuper wrote very adroitly in his book Soccer Against the Enemy, “When we say Americans don’t play soccer we are thinking of the big white people who live in the suburbs. Tens of millions of Hispanic Americans [and other nationalities] do play, and watch and read about soccer.” In other words, Beck rejects soccer because his idealized “real America” – in all its monochromatic glory – rejects it as well. To be clear, I know a lot of folks who can’t stand soccer. It’s simply a matter of taste. But for Beck it’s a lot more than, “Gee. It’s kind of boring.” Instead it’s, “Look out whitey! Felipe Melo’s gonna get your mama!”
So, the “right is racist” narrative reaches this too. Well, let’s shine the light of day on this, and take a look at what we really see.
I was a kid in the 70’s, and lived in SW PA. Needless to say, I was a Steelers & Pirates (They were actually good then!) fan. I looked up to a variety of Pittsburgh sports figures, like “Mean” Joe Greene, Mel Blount, the late Willie Stargell, Dwight White, Lynn Swan, John Stallworth, and a host of others. And I did so because they are ALL WHITE…right?
Americans apparently love the NFL, NCAA Football, MLB, and the NBA because the players are ALL WHITE, right?
There’s your “monochromatic glory,” you pinhead!
Come to think of it, lots of Canadians and Europeans like Hockey, and that is a pretty “monochromatic” sport. When are you going to call them racists?
I won’t hold my breath waiting for that answer.
You can make your own demotivators here.
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You know what would really make soccer cool? If you could pick up the ball and run with it, and the players could tackle each other, and it was called Rugby. Until then tied games and faked injuries do not interest me.
That would do it. Rugby is violent and physical. WAIT! That’s why we don’t like soccer! We’re violent rednecks!
Matt,
I agree with your post almost 100%. Soccer is the most boring thing in the world to watch. Its like watching an NFL game with 85 pass attempts and a final score of 3-0. Also, since Im on the right, I must be racist yet IM AN ESL TEACHER!!! Ha. Thats all I can say to that. But I do not agree with one thing…the Steelers are still good!!
My statement about being good is only for the Pirates. Sorry for confusion. Otherwise, welcome to the dark side, my friend.
Rugby is awesome.
In fact, a lot of other sports are cooler to watch than soccer. Bocce comes to mind. As does Curling.
I would add professional tiddly winks, but that would be overkill.
Matt, I don’t discriminate: I detest pretty much ALL sports, or at least have zero interest in them. I can’t even stand the sound of it on TV… the incessant sound of the crowd, and the announcers who never shut the @#$ up for two seconds. I also hate the ridiculous salaries of the players, and their often reprehensible behavior.
For the most part, Karen, you mentioned some of the best qualities of pro sports. Well, some announcers suck, but the salaries are based, at least in part (damn union), on the market. We watch, so the advertisers are willing to pay, so the networks pay a freakton of money to cover the games. Then, the stadiums are full, and people buy the merchandise. It’s capitalism!
I understand though. Not everybody partakes, but it’s big business for those in it.
I have to agree with you on the soccer thing. My boys play teeball and are green belts in karate. They aren’t quite old enough for peewee football, but that’s next!
Way to go Kristin!
The scoring is just too low. Maybe they should make the goal much wider and increase the scoring. Things were done in American Football to increase scoring over the years and those moves really helped the sport. The fans love scoring!
I’d put landmines around the goal, just to make it interesting.
Maybe they could improve soccer by having the players wear helmets and padding, making the teams line up and face each other between plays and change the shape of the ball to a more elongated, pointy shape.
Wait, that’s American Football….never mind.
Yeah, can’t improve on teh perfection, can ya?
I’m not white and i grew up in a country that does love soccer, but i didn’t take to it. I don’t think it’s all that bad, just not fast-paced enough for me. I have seen the really talented players and they are really something special, but there’s not enough moments of those in a game.
They don’t score enough goals in the damn thing and the possibility of sitting through 3 hours without a single goal is too much for me. I know that’s why Americans don’t like it, and i can’t blame you for it.
“Maybe they should make the goal much wider and increase the scoring. ”
Thinking the same thing Ron. But i don’t think it’ll happen, far too many around the world are happy to see nothing happen.
Thanks for the comment MK. I just don’ see anyway to improve it, other than making it full contact.
He was the man! When I was a kid, I actually thought he could jump 6 feet in the air! Hey, like I said, I was a kid! The Steelers ruled. Also as a kid, the Detroit Lions were every bit as distant to me as the Steelers, so I just liked the team with players I liked (and who could win). IMHO, the Bradshaw era Steelers were the best NFL team evah! “Mean Joe” Greene? C’mon … he was awesome! Wait a minute … am I allowed to say these things? Shhhhh … (i’m a white guy).
ROTFLMAO!
I played soccer for a number of years when I was young and enjoyed it, but never got into it as a spectator sport. Quite frankly, if you head down to one of the parks nearby here after work, you could watch some kids play the game and it’s a lot more fun to watch! Smaller field. More action.
I played rugby one year in high school. We had an elective gym class called “combat sports.” It was boxing, rugby, and wrestling. I’m lucky I got in, because the year I took it was the last year it was offered (’84-’85). I don’t remember all the rules to rugby anymore, but I remember it was a blast … and brutal.
I don’t think you’re all that far off on Swann. I remember this well. I watched the Steelers on TV, and Swann caught a TD, he continued to run thought the endzone. A car (a promotion?) was behind the ednzone. The dude jumped OVER the car! And this was the 70′s, cars weren’t exactly small, if you know what I mean.
Here’s the video.
Meh. Soccer bores me. But then I like baseball. I’m not making logical sense. But then that’s nothing new either.
Yeah, but hitting a 95 mph fastball is said to be the most difficult thing to do in sports, so there is an advantage.
You’ve been making perfectly good sense to me for years.
I have to agree about soccer. Although I pay very little attention to sports nowdays, back in the 70s, it was all Oklahoma Sooners and Dallas Cowboys for me and my twin brother.
Back to the political and societal part of this post, it bothers me greatly that so many people seem to want to change who we are in America. If there is so much wrong with the way we are already, why do those people insist on coming here to live? just a thought.
That is their purpose Larry. They are here to change us.
I love the picture at the top. I would watch soccor if they show something like that in slow motion every few minutes. I watch football, boxing, and MMA. Hmmmmm… I must be racist.
I hear ya. It would be like a fail-a-thon in slow motion.